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Easier To Remain A Victim

Story ID:3076
Written by:Charlene Smith (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:Story
Location:Woodstock Ontario Canada
Year:2007
Person:Anybody
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It is easier to remain a victim than to stop being one.

I know I will offend some people but they need to really ask theirselves, why are they offended by this statement?

People seem to forget that other than not having a choice on whether to be born, everyone has choice.

Even a baby chooses to do something or not to.

As we grow up as children we make choices good and bad.

It is what we learn from them that ultimately matters though.

Some of us grow up with really shitty lives.

We learn of hate, mental, physical, emotional and sexual abuse.

We learn about attempted suicide, alcohol and drug abuse does to people.

We learn the art of manipulation, the ability to get what we want, however we want,with whoever we want, no matter the cost to ourselves or others.

We learn what miscommunication and no communication does to a relationship.

We learn how what we want is more important than what anybody else wants and so we dismiss them as nothing.

It's our way or the highway, there is no compromise because nothing is more important than myself, my wants, my needs.

Then we get involved with another person and expect them to fulfill all OUR expectations and when they don't it is their fault when the relationship fails.

We expect THEM to make US happy,never realizing we have set the stage for the relationship to fail.

No sense looking at what WE are contributing to the problem.

It has to be their fault, can't be ours.

In order for ME to be part of the problem, it means I have to look deep down into MY own self and examine the real, true ME.

I can't do that because in order to do that then I have to admit that I am part of the problem also.

That means having to admit responsibility too.

I can't do that though because in order to do that, I can't be a victim.

It is easier to be a victim because society tells me nothing is MY fault, it is everybody else's fault.

If I am not a victim, then I lose MY IDENTITY.

It is comfortable being a victim then I don't have to be responsible for MY actions,I can blame it on someone else or MY past.

What nobody tells you though, is people get tired of victims.

They get tired of hearing how it is always someone else's fault.

They get tired of hearing you blame someone else or your past.

They want YOU to take OWNERSHIP of YOUR LIFE.

As I said earlier, even as a baby we make choices.

The difference between a baby and an adult is that when an ADULT makes a CHOICE, they should accept responsibility for THEIR choices.

That is what responsible adults do.

If you don't like the choices you make in life, learn from them and move on rather than blame everyone else and everything else for them.

Isn't that what we teach children?

Don't we teach children to choose things in life and whether they succeed or fail,don't we encourage them to learn from their choices?

Don't we teach them if they don't like the outcome to learn from it and try again?

It always amazes me that adults teach children these very things but are so quick to revert back to the ways of a child when things don't go as we expect them to.

It is easier to remain a victim then to accept responsibility for choices WE make and move on...