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Blatz Beer - Hot and Cold

Story ID:6864
Written by:Charles Dishno (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:Story
Location:Dillon Montana USA
Year:2011
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Blatz Beer Ė Hot and Cold
By Chuck Dishno

As my senior year at Bly High School was winding down, there was a New Yearís Eve Dance to be held in the school auditorium. Since we knew of this months in advance, we stated to figure where we would get something to drink and celebrate the New Year.

Most of my friends had some connections and werenít too worried about it but Doyle Miller and I didnít have a clue as to where we were going to get our beer but then an adult friend, who shall remain nameless, came forward and said he could get us a case of beer for a small profit to himself. We pooled our money and gave him the go-ahead to do the deed.

It was about a month and a half before the dance and we thought he would wait until just before we wanted it but much to our surprise he got it right away.

Now there are cheap beers and this was no exception. The brand name was Blatz and even at the best of times it tasted a lot like itís name.

Now we had our case of beer with over a month to go and being the cheap guys we were we didnít want to drink any of it until the dance since it was just too hard for us to replenish our supply.

To keep anyone from finding out we had this booty, we hid it under the steps going up to the projection room at the theatre where I worked as a projectionist and did other odd jobs.

This was OK for a week or so but the theatre owner, George Fullerton, was due to make his monthly trip to Bly and check things out. We were afraid he would find our beer so we moved it out to the furnace room and hid it behind the furnace.

The theatre was open 6 nights a week and one of my jobs was to build the fire in the furnace to heat the theatre about 2 hours before show time.

By this time it was early December and the nights were usually below freezing so the beer got alternated between zero and 70 above 6 nights a week. We didnít think too much about this and continued the process right up until New Yearís Eve.

Finally the big night arrived and we loaded our stash into my Model A and headed for the gymnasium.

I remember opening that first bottle of Blatz and taking a drink. I was only 18 years old and was no coinsure of beer but I knew right off the bat that something was wrong. It sure wasnít the stuff that our daddyís drank. To put it mildly, it was terrible. Doyle took a swig and almost threw up. Apparently, the nightly temperature change had its effect on the stuff.

Being the tight wads we were we couldnít let that beer go to waste, no matter how bad it tasted, so we drank it all. Iím sure that after a few it improved in taste. I have had many beers since but I canít remember any that were as bad as that Blatz was, either hot or cold.

I think that Al Gore would have deemed it the start of Global Warming. Just think how close we were to getting a Nobel Peace Prize