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Uncle Fossill Beats The High Gas Prices

Story ID:7168
Written by:bobby o'neill mitchum (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:Fiction
Location:Phenix City Alabama U.S.A.
Year:2011
Person:Self
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Ok,Every one I know is arguing about the high price of gasoline,food and power and it is the same way up there in Podunk County Tennessee where My Uncle Fosill lives,The only difference being is how He handles the situation.
Uncle Fossill told Aunt Flossie Mae to "Git" all them pork chops , cat fish and possum patties that She had been saving cause they was a gonna have a big Bar B. Que and invite all the neighbors,and sell them an all yew can eat fer fifty cents.
So they began cooking up big pots of possum stew,large plates of pork chops and huge bowls of cat fish,you could smell those vittles cooking for 5 miles away,why even cousin kloot mcdiddlehopper from clear over in the next county said He smelled them from his front yard.
As it turned out,there were so many guest at the cook out,that Uncle Fossill almost ran out of food an when the Mayor showed up with the Sheriff and the entire volinteer fire department of Podunk County,Uncle Fossill only had a few cat fish,a few pork chops and just a smidgin of possum stew left. Aunt Flossie Mae was all in a dither because She was afraid that Uncle Fossill would get in trouble for falsely advertising "ALL YOU CAN EAT FOR FIFTY CENTS" but Uncle Fossill wasn't worried,He deftly dished out one cat fish each to 30 firemen,one pork chop to the mayor and entourage and a smidgen of possum stew to the Sheriff.When the Mayor loudly complained about the portions and told Uncle Fossill that he had advertised "ALL YOU CAN EAT FOR FIFTY CENTS" Uncle Fossill calmly told Him well Mayor,that one little cat fish IS all YOU CAN EAT FOR FIFTY CENTS!
The Mayor sat down,finished His meal and all had a wonderful time picking on the banjo's doing the doh se doh and drinking moon shine for the remainder of the afternoon!!
Bob Mitchum :)