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Interview With An Unconventional Vampire

Story ID:7252
Written by:Lisa Godin (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:Story
Location:Cleveland Ohio USA
Year:2000
Person:me
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Sitting in the back seat of a cab.
"Lucy Luck roving reporter here. I've been assigned the most interesting interview of my entire career as reporter. I'm going to be interviewing a vampire. Yeah, yeah, laugh all you want. I sure did. I thought my boss was sipping one too many Martinis considering the fact that I don't for one minute believe in vampires, nor mummies, crypt keepers, Frankenstein and the like. But it's a good paying assignment so who am I to pick and choose who I talk to? Cabbie! Could you step on it a little?"
"Awww hold your freakin' pants on lady!"
"If I'm late for my interview at the..." I unfold a slip of paper from my pocket "Graceful Manor Condominiums, my pants will be stuffed so far up your..."
Cabbie rapidly accelerated through the dark country road and pulls up into the condo drive. I look at my watch.
"Two minutes before midnight. Excellent timing."
I got out of the cab.
"How much?"
"$18.00."
"Robber."
"It's a living!"
I hand the money over and walk up to the door.
"This Condominium is absolutely beautiful! No gates, no howling Rottweilers, no mists, no rotting vines creeping up the walls. Something just doesn't add up."
A very handsome blond man with very broad shoulders, piercing blue eyes, dressed in black sweats clutching a white towel opens the door for me
"Good evening."
"Hello. I'm looking for..."
"That's me. Would you follow me please?"
Warily I follow this polite hulk of a man with British accent to his suite and walk through the open door. I was astounded at the interior. It was very clean, smelling of freshly polished cherry wood and leather from the newly dusted books on the library shelves. The room was aglow with two Tiffany lamps set on an antique coffee table in front of the couch. Black velvet it looks like.
"May I take your coat?"
"No thank you."
"Suit yourself."
The man sat upon his couch
"Excuse me but perhaps I've gotten the wrong person after all. Are you...?"
"Yes I am."
"But according to my boss your name is Jack Drew."
"Who were you expecting, Count Dracula?"
"I suppose I was."
"And I suppose you expected me to be dressed in the usual cape and clothes that stink of a cemetery, and expected to be taken to a dark dingy castle, eh?"
"Yes"
Jack patted the couch cushion beside him
"I'm sorry to disappoint you. Please sit."
Cautiously I sat
"Relax, Miss Luck. I'm not going to hurt you."
Jack Drew stood
"Now, can I get you any refreshments? I have coffee, tea, Ginger Ale, milk and assorted alcoholic beverages."
I laughed nervously
"I thought maybe you'd offer me a Bloody Mary."
"If that's what you prefer."
"No thank you, nothing for me."
"Very well. I'm going to get me a spot of Sherry. It's very good after working out. Seems to hit the spot nicely for some reason. You were expecting me to haul out a unit of blood no doubt."
I nodded.
Jack sighed.
"Understandable. As I work the night shift at the blood bank I take a spot here and there which no one ever misses so I'm not constantly yearning for blood."
Tossing aside his work out towel Jack Drew disappears into the kitchen to get his drink quickly returning and sitting beside me casually sipping his Sherry.
"Now, shall we begin?"
"Yes. Tell me a little about yourself
Mr. Drew. You have an English accent I've noticed."
"Yes it does stick out like a sore thumb doesn't it. I was born in 1775 London, and worked as a ship builder until my unfortunate encounter with a fellow vampire. A quite nasty brute actually. Since then I've traveled the world seeing the nightly sights and ended up in your beautiful United States. I've been a citizen for quite some time of course. But my heart will always belong in England you know. And no I don't go out nightly to wreak havoc among your citizens."
He sips more Sherry.
"Uh...can I see your fangs?"
Angrily Jack Drew got off the couch and slammed his goblet of Sherry onto the coffee table.
"Really Miss Luck! My dentition is not for display for your morbid curiosity! Nor will I show you a coffin that you stereotypically think I own because I prefer sleeping in a comfortable four poster bed, with lovely silk sheets and pillows I might add, I don't turn into those nasty bats that I see your vampires do on those silly late night movies, nor will I parade myself in front of any mirrors to demonstrate my lack of reflection! I'm not a performing circus animal!"
"I-I'm sorry."
"You should be!"
Jack pointed to his bookcase.
"There you'll find lovely poetry, art, history, and some wonderful romance novels. I even fancy some of your Science Fiction writers. Not one horror book will you find because they're absolute rubbish! Nothing original, nothing true, absolute rubbish!"
I was fuming.
"You can't berate me for expecting something that you're not when all I've heard about vampires is everything you despise! I don't see many vampires or wolfmen or monsters knocking on people's doors saying what you've heard of me is wrong because they just don't exist."
"Can't I be just a bit miffed, Miss Luck! Obviously I exist. In the flesh, and it's not stinking of death because I do take showers. I take pride in my hygiene, I take pride in keeping fit. I do have a job and go to various clubs to mix with the natives so I'm proof that everything you've heard about vampires is rubbish.
"Tell me, Miss Luck, have you ever been judged by what people have mistakenly said about you?"
"I don't understand."
"You're a reporter. For a long time I thought all reporters made up the news and could've cared less about the facts. I found to my delight that there are conscientious reporters who gladly publish fact not fiction, and there are still those who go on a story with a closed mind. Some of them are worse than vultures, feeding off the misery of others just to sell papers, wasting time with interviews which are filled with lies they wish to perpetuate, and we're the ones who are called blood suckers and demons!"
"Well it does annoy me that we have that unnearned reputation."
"My point exactly, Miss Luck. That's how we feel. We're not all birds of the same feather as they say so I'm hardly the evil vampire like the man who indoctrinated me nor what you see in movies."
"I apologize again for upsetting you. It wasn't my intention."
"You're forgiven this time. I hope you won't make the same mistake should your boss ask you again to interview someone of a different lifestyle." Jack Drew downed his Sherry. "Could you kindly give me the hour? My clock in the kitchen no longer works. Blasted invention those batteries. They never last long."
I look at my watch, horrified.
"It's late! It's 2.a.m.!"
"I just bought Cable and I really do fancy the Discovery Channel. They're having a program on the sun according to the guide, and I do so love the stars. Would you care to join me in the bedroom where my telly is? We could have a lovely discussion about what we saw afterwards. My couch is very comfy so you won't have trouble sleeping and I have plenty of extra blankets for visitors. Being out at night is not safe for pretty young ladies you know."
I smiled.
"I would be delighted. And I think I'll have a little Sherry after all."
"Lovely! Come along luv. Can't miss anything now can we."
Happily I followed Mr. Drew into the bedroom.