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A Cold Duck New Year

Story ID:8581
Written by:Charles Dishno (bio, contact, other stories)
Story type:Musings, Essays and Such
Location:Dillon Montana USA
Year:2012
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A Cold Duck New Year
By Chuck Dishno
December 2012Ö

About 40 years ago I was working for Fresno County Department of Education. Running their printing department. Roz and I had been married for a little over two years and we decided to spend New Yearís at Yosemite National Park. Yosemite was about 80 miles from Fresno. We had been there many times but never in the winter. We made arrangements to stay at the White Chief Motel in the town of Fish Camp, just outside the park boundary. We would spend New Yearís Eve. There and drive into the park the next morning

I had several girls working for me in the printing department. One was a Japanese girl named Teeny. This was about the time the champagne Cold Duck became popular and was the rage of most parties. Most of it was fairly expensive and I was surprised when Teeny gave me a bottle for Christmas. It was a label I didnít recognize but what the heck, Cold Duck had to be Cold Duck and I assumed that it must be good. Wrong!!!

After Roz and I had a late dinner in Fish Camp, we retired to our motel room to toast in the New Year. When I opened the bottle of champagne, it did itís usual pop as the cork came out but that was about as close to champagne as it came. To put it mildly, it was terrible! But because it was warm, I thought maybe chilling it would help. There was no refrigerator in the room so I went outside and scooped up a wastebasket full of snow. After I settled the bottle in the snow, I then put the basket in the bathroom.

It was well past midnight and we were tired from the drive so headed for bed. We were planning to get up early the next morning and drive into Yosemite.

We had been in bed about two hours when we heard a loud pop and something hit the wall just over the headboard of the bed. Apparently the heater in the bathroom had melted the snow and the pressure built up under the cork which blew out like a rifle shot. Fortunately, Roz and I were not in a compromising position or I would have had to make an emergency trip to a hospital for cork removal. Roz was laughing and said she could just hear me explaining to the nurse on duty that it had been caused by a hot goose from a cold duck.

All went well for the rest of the trip and upon returning; Teeny asked me how I liked the Cold Duck. I said it was just fine but did not recognize that brand and asked where she bought it. She said that a discount drug store had it on sale for $1.29. I guess price does make a difference.

I hope that in my next life, when they give me communion, it is not made from cheap Cold Duck. If so it may be revenge from all those ducks and geese I had dispatched over the years.